Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Cohabitation=Stronger Marriage?

 I remember it wasn't until a couple semesters ago that I have thought living with your partner before you are married would increase your chances for a successful marriage. I mean it's common sense right? If you were to live together you are able to see if you would be able to be married together. You will see if you can spend 24/7 with that person and deal with them at all times. Makes sense right? I mean wouldn't you want to see if you are compatible with someone before you are married? Well that is what I thought too until I took a marriage prep class at my school and I read the statistics. People who live together before marriage are more likely to get divorced then those who do not live together before marriage. There are so many statistics that prove the damaging effects of cohabitation and also the benefits of waiting till marriage to live together. Couples that cohabit are more likely to higher to have acts violence, have more health problems, and children who are born into parents that cohabit are five times more likely experience parental separation. On the other hand, couples that wait have a better sex life, better quality of relationship, and overall have greater happiness.

It is interesting to find as well that couples who live together before are more likely to have poorer marital problem-solving skills. I think something that is not as obvious to people is when two people more in together beforehand, they are like roommates. They each have their own stuff but it's not THEIR stuff. This translates into their marriage where they still have a hard time looking at their things as something they own together. This way of thinking can be very detrimental to their marriage. They don't have that shared foundation like couples who don't cohabit to. Reading more into why living together  before marriage is bad really opened my eyes and I hope the few words I said opened yours too!

Sources: Marriage and Family By Lauer and Lauer

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